dogs/cats

  • Friday, April 17, 2020

Las Vegas - We've been scrutinizing the NFL Draft the last few days, and think that there are a handful of props worth some cash, but today, we turn to the absolutely SILLY.

Everybody LOVES dogs & cats and according to the American Pet Products Association (APPA), almost 70 percent of U.S. households own some sort of pet. Among those pets were about 94 million cats and around 90 million dogs. The Ecks & Bacon clan is ALL dog, and have owned Boxers for the last maybe 40 years. So, of course, we have a prop for that as it relates to the draft.

The draft is gonna be all virtual, from Roger Goodell's basement, to NOT a brewery in New Orleans, to a bunch of private homes. The league has shipped, or will ship, video equipment to 58 prospects for interview opportunities as well as hookups to all the war rooms. Which brings us to the first delicious prop.

How many dogs will be shown on camera during the first round? Under 3.5 dogs is -$140, while Over 3.5 dogs is +$120. Doing the math, if there are 58 prospects wired up, as well as Goodell and various teams reps, all we need is 5% to let a doggie run through their room, and we cash. Going OVER 3.5 dogs to appear on camera.

How many cats will be shown on camera during the first round? Under .5 a cat is -$120, while Over .5 a cat is also -$120. Don't have a cat, DON'T like cats, and not gonna throw down, but do have a question. What does HALF a cat actually look like?

With the social distancing, the next prop is very current. What will be the highest number of people in a room? Over 9.5 people is the favorite at -$160, while under 9.5 people is the underdog at +$130. No opinion.

Finally, we're not sure about the sponsors on ESPN and the NFL Network, but gotta believe that somewhere along the line, there will be a beer company. So, the last SILLY prop is, will any draftee be shown drinking a beer? No is a substantial favorite at -$400, while yes is +$300. Don't really care for beer, so in the words of my man Mark Cuban on 'Shark Tank,' for that reason, I'm OUT!!!

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